I'm not feeling very Christian on this Easter morning.. I'm feeling angry and resentful and depressed. No baby, birthday plans ruined, no Easter church service. Alert the media, I'm feeling sorry for myself, what the hell else is new. Whatever, who wants to turn 30 anyway... although 29 couldnt have sucked any worse had I been maimed limb for limb and what was left of me thrown in front of a subway. that's a nice image of "would you rather", isnt it? Would you rather your child died, or be thrown in front of a subway? Take my word for it, the decision is easy.
I dont know why I expected anything of my birthday or Easter, that was seriously foolish of me, so this disappointment serves me right.... Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, our anniversary, New Years, and Valentines Day all either sucked or didnt exist in this house, so I should have learned my lesson about the holidays by now. Up next: Mother's Day. CANT FUCKING WAIT!!!
I still hate the universe.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
i'm sorry, beth. i hope tomorrow is a better day and that your 30th year is filled with hope and many blessings. hugs.
ReplyDeleteSmile through your tears, Beth.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you.
xo
So sorry. I dread the holidays too. (((HUGS)))
ReplyDeletei'm with you on my 29th year being terrible, unfortunately dealing with grief has made my 30th year a constant roller coaster ride of emotions! life sucks...right now!
ReplyDeleteOh Beth... thanks for the "would you rather" example. I love that game and it's perfectly fitting for the situation we're in. As for the birthday: me too. What is there to celebrate?
ReplyDeleteAnyway, without knowing when exactly you hit the big 3-0... I wish it to be a great year for you with a lot more sunshine and giggles than the 29th have been. Hang in there, strong aries-girl! And Happy (nonetheless) Birthday!